Regret

One thing I hate is, regret.

Right now, I feel remorseful for not taming my tongue, sinning in my anger, dishonouring my father and probably crushing his spirit by saying words in anger.

He is probably the man who loves me the most, besides Jesus. Yet, I chose to crush him and humiliate him, highlight his weaknesses and disregard any achievements. I chose to give in to my emotions, I chose to let all hell break loose to make myself feel better at the cost of making him feel worse.

Who knows what is behind the egoistic stubborn judgements I make?

It could be hurt, loneliness, rejection, low self-esteem, past wounds that have not healed.

Lord, please help me die to self.. please help me take up my cross.

Please forgive me for the harm that I have done, please forgive me for the way my tongue has brought hurt and destruction rather than healing and praise.

In Jesus' name,
Amen.